Reprint. Originally published: ©1989

Includes bibliographical references (pages 307-308)

I. Toxic parents. -- Godlike parents : the myth of the perfect parent -- "Just because you didn't mean it doesn't mean it didn't hurt" : the inadequate parents -- "Why can't they let me live my own life?" : the controllers -- "No one in this family is an alcoholic" : the alcoholics -- The bruises are all on the inside : the verbal abusers -- Sometimes the bruises are on the outside, too : the physical abusers -- The ultimate betrayal : the sexual abusers -- Why do parents behave this way? : the family system -- II. Reclaiming your life. -- You don't have to forgive -- "I'm a grown-up. Why don't I feel like one?" -- The beginnings of self-definition -- Who's really responsible? -- Confrontation : the road to independence -- Healing the incest wound -- Breaking the cycle -- Epilogue: letting go of the struggle

The connection between controlling abusive or alcoholic parents and adult problems with self-esteem, work, or intimacy is examined in a guide to coming to terms with a troubled childhood

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